talked to sylvia today. she's good to talk to when you can't get sleep cause you're thinking about stuff.
of course, she really didn't tell me anything i didn't know. if i have such a burden for sarah then God's trying to tell me something. to talk to her. find out more about her situation. ask her some hard questions. she brought up this verse in timothy that she likes to use. i think it's timothy, the one about if you know someone is doing wrong and you don't say anything their blood is on your hands...
yeah, kind of scary, and she uses it alot, but i can see why. it makes sense.
we talked about basically everything that's been keeping me from sleeping these last few nights.
it's a combination of that and the fact that i haven't read my bible since November 5th. it's been a whole month and i haven't read once. i read a verse last night but it wasn't for me. i'm glad i read it thought. i decided to print it out and put it next to my mirror so i can read it every day. but i haven't been reading.
if i want my life to work, i need to know what God wants to do with it. how am i going to find that out if i'm being stubborn and lazy and selfish with my time? i'm not. even if i read the purpose driven life over and over again, i fear i wouldn't get it. i need to read the bible!
walked out of work this evening and see i have a missed call from aranel. strange? no, it just coinsides with the convo i had earlier with sylvia. she didn't leave a message, but i called her back.
we had a good convo. about a half hours worth of stuff. talked about the ring and the decisions david and i are going to have to make and the ones her and shaun are going to have to make - which aren't that different from eachother.
i asked if he was saved. she said he was...by the standards of the catholic church...i don't know what that means and when i asked her what that was, exactly, she kind of skipped into the next topic of where they were going to be married.
i'll just have to ask shaun. *shrug*
if they're getting married at his church she has to get confirmed. i was baffled at this and almost said "confirmed? you already are! jesus confirmed you when you accepted him. you dont' have to do that." but i didn't. prolly should've but didn't.
the other thing is where are they going to attend church? shaun loves his church and aranel loves hers. she was away for a while, but came back and realized how much she missed it. so...they're almost in the same predicament that david and i will be in. we love our churches! i don't feel like i can leave mine and i don't want to ask him to leave his. we have some time to pray and ask God to show us where he wants us. could be a church we've never been to. who knows.
aranel and i plan to hang out at her house tomorrow night. shaun is going bowling and my david will be in class. if lspeth is free, she may come too.
i'm relieved. my mom and i were talking about how to start hanging out with her again. a life-changing decision would be a good start.
besides, she needs to know i'm there for her no matter what. that's what christian brothers and sisters do. i like it. and if i were in her situation i'd want her there. no doubt. even if she didn't agree with whatever, i'd want to know she was there to do whatever it is God wanted her to do in my life.
and i'm rambling again. i've talked my mom's and david's ears off about all this stuff so now it's you guys i'm turning to.
thanks for your prayers and your heart-given advice and thoughts. i love you guys cause of that. thanks for being my most excellent friends that i've never met face to face. you mean alot to me. i mean that!!!!! - weller